I am beging to wonder why i am here. I live in toronto but i hate it and i would love to move home but really i don't think that would be the best things for me. Money is the only reason i am living here well and i need time to be alone. but really why. I went home the past week and had a blast, but the more i think about it now i wonder if people were only happy to see me because i would buy them a drink or so. I have started thinking that i write in here just to write it, i don't know if anyone reads it or not but for some reason i really just stopped carring. i have started listing to a really go song, by finger eleven called thousand mile wish its started making me think.

you know sometimes i think that my blog is as good as an email i would never send anyone. if you read it great if not well great i guess. save you from another person bitching about shit.

sometimes i wish i could have been a different person, one who didn't fuck up everyone he knew, even if i didn't i still feel i have.

living this life is hard even when i day it doesn't bother me sometimes it does and i just don't know what to do, but i know thats life you never know the shit you will come in contact with you just have to live through it and if you don't your just another problem.